writhe

at the end of a stick
dangling from a string
i dance
playing out my smiles for this world of make-believe
i am dying inside

Pasted on sparkles in my eyes
tell you lies of happiness
but i digress in my mind

pleading for the end of this misery
i wont allow myself to wallow
i move through this life
on the end of a string
dancing

playing all the parts i must play
just to make it through the day
i cry
dry, silent tears
that leave no trace


i laugh at my folly
this lack of anything
has made me nothing
and i scream out against the darkness that was once my refuge
pushing it away and trying
trying
trying

I am all and only what i can be
but
it seems that she is not enough
she listens and laughs and caresses and learns
but she never learns enough

so i dangle at the end of my string
and dance
bound by fear and regret and sorrow

and i try not to think about the reasons why
i try